When I was a kid, my Mom bought me a diary with a small brass key. I wrote in it every day until my sister peeked into it and that was the end of my diary writing, especially when she found out I had a crush on her boyfriend. He was a dork.

I’d forgotten all that until people in the business started insisting that I do a blog. “It’ll make people like you … ” “You can show how smart you are…” yada yada.

So, I set up joyofdirectmarketing.com to write about our clients’ direct marketing efforts, as well as my speeches and books. Then my assistant at the time said that no one does direct marketing any more (as in direct mail – boy was she wrong). That threw a wrench into things for a while.

Then someone else here at the office wondered about the objective of the blog and if I was going to build continuity, progress constantly and develop content. Hmmm. This was becoming too much like work, not at all like my diary days when it was fun.

Then my friend, Amy Africa blogged that somehow my blog is stiff and not like me at all. No trolls and such. You can read about it here: Amy Africa’s QLOG

People responded to Amy (as they always do) with ideas for improving content, type fonts, email capture, colors, adding a photo of me and everyone said to lose the calendar. (God knows where that came from anyway).
So, I figured I should check out some other blogs.

Amy’s good friend, Debra Ellis, has an interesting one here: Wilson Ellis Consulting Blog (I adore her from Twitter.)

I attend #blogchat on Twitter most Sunday nights about 8pm, and Mack Collier runs this information-packed session (you need to be on tweetdeck though), and I like his blog: Mack Collier’s Blog

I now read Dianna Huff’s b-to-b blog all the time: Dianna Huff’s Blog

And for fun, I follow the Brazen Careerist, Penelope Trunk – a city person marrying a farmer who has somehow got me engaged in her whole life, like a soap opera. Take a look at it: Penelope Trunk’s Blog

My friend Dwain told me about the blog: Small Dead Animals. Take a look at it here, and you’ll be hooked: SmallDeadAnimals.com

As I’m checking them all out, I’m wondering more and more why I need a blog, what it’s good for. I still have no idea.

If you get a chance, let me know what you think! Thank you.

by: Tamar Weinberg

Reviewed by Lois Geller

Reading this book reminded me of something and it tugged at the back of memory until it burst through.
Keats!

195 years ago, John Keats wrote a sonnet called On First Looking into Chapman’s Homer. Chapman was George Chapman and his translations of Homer’s Odyssey and Iliad struck Keats as rather splendid:

“… I heard Chapman speak out loud and bold:
Then felt I like some watcher of the skies
When a new planet swims into his ken;”

That’s how I feel about Tamar Weinberg’s new book about Marketing on the Social Web and if I could write like Keats I’d compose a sonnet to her on the spot, perhaps borrowing those lines :

“… I heard Chapman Weinberg speak out loud and bold:
Then felt I like some watcher of the skies
When a new planet swims into his her ken;”

It’s that kind of book, an eye opener, a gentle slap to the back of the head.

Just as Keats had read other translations of Homer, I’d read other books about the Social Web and I am on Twitter, Plaxo, Ecademy, Facebook and LinkedIn and I thought I was doing pretty well with them.

Then that new planet swam into my ken and I realized I’d been a village blacksmith tinkering with a jet engine.

This book is so comprehensive, that I learned about StumbleUpon (still not sure how that works), and delicious.com and RSS feeds, bookmarking and whole new worlds I’d only heard about. The 346 page volume is packed with all kinds of new opportunities, for people like me who love marketing.

Tamar (I don’t know her but I hope to be on a first name basis some day) starts from the start assuming her readers know nothing about the Social Web, and, compared to her, that’s a good bet no matter what readers think they know.

She holds your hand and in tight, readable prose walks you through this Wonderland. She tells you that it is really conversation marketing. She tells you how to do it (or get it done), how to get photos and video on social sites, what language to use (and not use), how to build your reputation and your following, and, most of all and dear to the heart of this direct marketer, how to use social sites to sell.

She tells you who’s already miles ahead of you (and why) and not to worry because you can catch up in no time – if you pay attention to Tamar, my new BFF.

Get this book, read it, read it again, keep it by your side and grow rich in your pajamas, working online at home, having fun and making friends even if you’re the marketing head of a Fortune 500 company.

P.S. I went to a local Barnes & Noble to buy a copy for my client, and they were sold out. That’s another good sign.

Sometimes I use humor in my speeches!

Friday morning I was on the Jim Blasingame radio show, and was talking about humor (Click Here To Hear The Show). So does humor work in advertising, in the social media?

It depends. A pretty good rule of thumb is that humor doesn’t work but that’s because you have to be really, really good and have a great client to make it work.

Most lesser talents think humor is jokes and vice versa and that’s simply not true. As David Ogilvy famously said, quoting Claude Hopkins, “People don’t buy from clowns.”

Humor works when it’s right, (often) self-deprecating and woven (seemingly) effortlessly into a USP.

When I was working in Canada and we had Tourism Canada as a client, we learned that US visitors came from everywhere but Texas. Could we do something about Texas? Our Creative Director, put a huge close-cut photo of a moose on the face of a white 9” x 12” envelope with the headline “Got any of these in Texas?” Bingo, Texas problem solved for Canada Tourism.

When I was head of Geller Direct at TBWA in New York, we worked on the Absolut Vodka business. The client, Michel Roux, told the creative team they could show the bottle profile with two words and one of the words had to be Absolut. The other could be anything.
They looked at each other. What? Then they came up with one of the most humorous and effective ad campaigns of all time.

One of the reasons jokes, visual or verbal, don’t do well in ads is that people often don’t get them or even notice them. And when they do get the joke, they remember the joke and not the product.

The funny Super Bowl ads (the reason I watch the game) get a laugh, once, and then all those millions of dollars are gone. Maybe they help the brand, maybe not.

I think I remember two over the years. One was back in the dot com craze when some idiots thought it would be funny to shot gerbils from a cannon (it wasn’t) and the other had a guy in a clown suit with the suit – including the clown head – upside down. He ordered a Bud and … well, never mind where he put the bottle. Two ladies in the commercial had the vapors. Ever saw the spot again.

Older readers (as old as, say 40) probably remember Mr. Whipple, the supermarket who nagged his customers with “please don’t squeeze the Charmin”. He wasn’t funny, at least not at first but over a 21 year campaign and 500 spots, Mr. Whipple (Dick Wilson appeared in al 500 spots) developed a hokey homespun kitchiness that I still think of when I buy toilet paper.

In 1984, Wendy’s hired 81-year old Clara Peller to look askance at a competitor’s puny hamburger and blurt “Where’s the beef”? Wendy’s started to take off. Humor can work, gentle humor that integrates the product and will continue over time to amuse middle America, not wiseacre agency kids.

So here are a few things you might consider about using humor in today’s climate:

1. Humor cheers people up. I got a postcard about a “hot copywriter” with a photo of a handsome young guy who writes great copy. It was fun. In mice type it said “appearance of some copywriters may vary.” Funny and focused.
2. Don’t “knock-knock” it until you’ve tried it; test a humorous approach vs. straight creative. Do a 50 – 50 split if it’s email or direct mail.
3. Play to your target audience. When using humor don’t use toilet funnies, unless you’re a plumber. The New Yorker keeps its circulation because of the cartoons, and they’re often earthy and sometimes sophisticated. Consider your own audience, and how you might laugh with them.
4. Brevity is important in this time of Twitter messages, IM and sound bites. Brevity is also the soul of wit, if you believe Polonius in Hamlet. If you use humor, begin with it and make it short and sweet to make your point.
5. Consider radio. In one commercial I heard recently an announcer called a healthcare company and had a hard time talking because a lobster had clamped onto his tongue – so the listener actually focused on his message.

Humor works if it’s relevant. If you just want to be funny, try Caroline’s.

My Creative Director and friend Michael McCormick (Guts of a Burglar blogster) needs a new car (at least I think so). His Ford Explorer is 12 years old, runs like a top and still looks pretty good … on the outside.

The inside is a different matter entirely. Passengers have to fly their legs over the Sirius antenna wire; the spots and stains are, well, spots and stains. The A/C in the back doesn’t work anymore and the vehicle is almost ready for its confirmation or bar mitzvah.

When Michael got this Explorer back in the late ‘90s (it’s his second one), I went with him to the dealership in Queens. He told the saleslady what he wanted, and she asked him what color he liked.

Anything you have is fine, he said. She and I looked at each other in disbelief.

Anyway, I thought the Cash for Clunkers program was a heaven sent opportunity for Michael to get a new ride. He disagreed. He thinks his Chuck (the Truck) is barely broken in. The tires are new, the brakes are new, the oil’s been changed and fluids checked every 3,000 miles. Yada yada.

It took me a while to understand his real reason.

For weeks I encouraged him to go to see the new cars. He wants an Explorer but the closest Ford dealership closed and they don’t make Explorers anymore, anyway.

So, I went to tweetdeck and started asking around. @ScottMonty, Ford’s Twitter spokesperson, gave me some recommendations. Another friend suggested the Flex and sent me photos. No buying action. I asked Michael why he wasn’t moving on this.

Turns out he really and truly doesn’t think taxpayers should be subsidizing his new car. Hmm. Hadn’t thought of that. And, he pointed out, a new vehicle cost a lot more than $4,500, perhaps around $25,000 more for what he wants. Why spend all that dough when he doesn’t need a new car? Men are soooo logical. It’s frustrating. But I already knew that. The new insights this whole episode provided got me thinking.

Not too long ago, the only way Ford could show its cars was in print or television advertising. Now that’s all changed.

What we see on TV or in ads is one-way communication, the company talking at us and controlling the flow of information.

Now we control the flow of information and we can find what we want, when we want it and consult with friends and family and experts along the way. I’ve known all this in theory and in making smaller purchasers for quite a while, but it’s a different matter to experience the whole process for a big ticket item (like a new SUV) in the real world of actually buying it.

In the meantime, people haven’t stopped looking for authenticity. And marketers are paying serious attention to what’s going on in Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn. On the web, customers can find anything, competitive prices, colors, and visit a website and buy anything in a NY minute.

Except, of course, Michael. He’ll be driving that car and me – and, horrors, clients – into the ground. Eventually, he’ll chat with a few friends and head off and buy a Flex or Edge or, who knows, a Club Cab F-250 – purple with a yellow interior, that some dealer happens to have on the lot and ready to roll.

A therapy dog can be any breed from a teacup Yorkie to an Irish Wolfhound as long as it’s calm, tolerates other animals and loves to be petted by strangers. They’re great at places like old folks’ homes, hospital wards for kids with long term illnesses, even prisons. Therapy dogs are happy to see you, whoever you are.

I have two cats at home that I think of as therapy animals. Mortimer, huge and orange with an extra toe on each of his four feet, loves everyone; Lucy, small, black and white, and younger likes three people plus Mortimer – and in the whole world that’s it for objects of her affections.

When we had an office near my apartment in New York, I used to bring my cats to work but now that we’re in our Hollywood, Florida marina office two and a half miles from home, I can’t do that anymore.
But I do have Cappy.

Cappy’s a Maltese Terrier who belongs to Bruce and Lara, a nice couple from New England. They sailed into the marina (our office is on the second floor of the Harbor master’s office) a year and a half ago and took a more or less permanent lease on a slip right outside my office window.

They live in their sail boat, and they share our huge downstairs terrace with us and people from other boats. It’s a very collegial gathering and was somewhat staid until Bruce and Lara brought home a tiny white bundle of fur. Cappy.

Dogs need somewhere to run off their leashes but you can’t take a dog off the leash in the marina. So Cappy comes upstairs to run around our offices. And run he does. Nonstop for the first 5 minutes, ripping figure eights around tables and chairs, racing after the balls we throw him for him.

His favorite spot is under my desk where he might find a crumb or two leftover from my lunch. When he (and Bruce and Lara, of course) went up north for a few weeks, I was bereft. No Cappy.

It is interesting that a dog can cheer you up; as you laugh, the creative juices start flowing again. I’m thinking of giving him a job as our Growler in Chief. Last week he accidentally took a small chunk out of Michael’s right hand when they both reached for a tennis ball at the same time. Good thing Michael throws leftie.

Cappy doesn’t know it, and wouldn’t care if he did, but he’s a therapy dog. Thanks, Capster for making Lois Geller Marketing Group’s office (a.k.a. Cappy’s Run), a happier place to work.

Twitter’s site went down for a few hours the other day and within 15 minutes I started feeling the pangs of withdrawal. Why? My goodness, it’s just a web site for short messages, isn’t it?

As I thought about it last night – why am I so attracted to Twitter? – it occurred to me that the reason might lie in Twitter’s competitive value to small companies like mine. In an important way, it gives us a leg up on big companies.

A lot of corporations worry about Twitter. Many of them don’t want to tweet on their own because they can’t control the process tightly; maybe employees will give people a bad impression of their brand. So they turn to their large agencies for help in testing social media. The large agency gives the job to junior creative people who do the best they can. The problem is that they can’t come up with revenue projections for Twitter results.

But small companies can really go to town with Twitter marketing. They can be themselves. If they’re looking for local customers, they can find them on Search. So if, for example, I have a store that specializes in interesting kites, I can talk about all the people who fly kites, I can give ideas for parties, have kite flying contests and sell discount kites, Twitter invite only, say once a month.

After several months, I can track ROI on Twitter much more easily than a large company ever could. This means that small businesses can:

• Build a great big wonderful Brand and voice that sound like they come from a real person;

• Begin to develop really solid friendships.

I’ve been doing this for a while now and I’m seeing real value. And I actually do feel a lot like the man behind the curtain, the Wizard of Twitter, pulling all the right levers.

If you’re interested in a Twitter or Social Media Program, feel free to call: 646-723-3231 or to visit me, on Twitter, of course, at twitter.com/loisgeller

I was speaking recently at the Boca Raton Hotel, and one of the conference attendees said that most websites and blogs have deadly boring personalities. She said yours don’t!

It was a flattering remark, and I knew what she meant. The websites we create have something unique about them. Your eyes don’t glaze over when you see them, whether it is
for a dry cleaner or for an association, I think that:

Websites should be interesting:

1. They should look unique, have character, do something different than your competitors’ do.

2. Your “Stand out” benefit should show. If you’re the drycleaner that can get the ink off my linen jacket. Then maybe that should be featured in a museum.

3. You should ask for visitors’ email addresses, and give them something Free for it.

4. Your website brand should be the same as the one in your store, in your catalog…everywhere, so people remember it.

5. On this website, the dry cleaner is on a busy street, but you can always spot her truck with her Apthorp Cleaners brand on it…in all the traffic.

Continue the conversation with you visitors with a great e-newsletter or Tip of the Month…and remember to thank them at holiday time, birthdays, and odd holidays.

Call us about your website: Lois Geller: 646-723-3231

Lois K. Geller
President
Lois Geller Marketing Group
1400 Marina Dr.
Hollywood, FL 33019
P. (646) 723-3235
F. (954) 456-2877
Visit me at: http://www.joyofdirectmarketing.com
http://www.twitter.com/loisgeller